Bad Hair Day

Fergie Fuzz

In my quest to document bad celebrity hair, I realize focusing on pop pan flashes like Fergie won't result in the most timeless of posts. Because really, will we even know or care who she is in 18 months?  I hope not.  But in 18 months she will still be hopeless when it comes to her hair.  Poorly groomed, hideously highlighted - I half expected to see some bad chunky blonde pieces in her armpit hair.  But her armpit hair isn't that bad and armpit fuzz isn't her greatest follicle faux pais (see here.) If Bad Hair karma ever forced me to choose between having Fergie's head hair or having Fergie's armpit hair - I'd choose the latter.  Wouldn't you?

Source Hollywood Tuna

Fergie: Bad Hair Before and After

I know a lot of blogs have picked up this picture of Fergie's Curler Mohawk from TMZ.com.  Of course, being a Bad Hair fanatic, I had to find the end result of this set.  And to be honest (because when am I not?), she looks better in the curlers.  At least with the curlers in you can't see how weighed down with product and poorly textured her hair is. I will throw this dog a bone, though, and say that her highlights are a significant improvement over her former stripes.  Now, if only this dog was housebroken.

Fergie: The Death of the Headband.

Congratulations, Fergie.  You have now officially killed the headband trend.  Like everything else you do, your hair overdone and done poorly.

Congratulations as well for getting your own Fergie category at BHD.

Fergie: Bad Hair Cake Walk

Fergie, you are dangerously close to getting your own category on BHD (see here and here).  It must be hard for Fergie to choose quality stylists, in the same way that it's hard for her to choose capable plastic surgeons.

Sadly, piling her hair on top of her head in a funky, frumpy shape will not distact the world from her microwaved/melted Barbie doll face.  Fergie's bad hair is just the icing on her fugly cake.  And why exactly, is Josh Duhamel eating this cake?

Image Source: dlisted

Fergie: Bad Hair in a Bottle

Oh Fergie, only you would request to look like an I Dream of Jeanie Barbie Doll that's been put in the microwave for 10 seconds.

I don't know what's worse.  Those terrible clip on bangs, the gaudy ponytail accessory, or the ponytail peppered with scrunchies throughout.

Remember, when it comes to hair: Less is more.  Cramming too much crap into the same style looks as tired and fugly as Fergie does here, and every single day of her life.

Lindsay Lohan and Fergie: BBHFF, Best Bad Hair Friends Forever

These women are trying - they really are.  Over the past couple months, thousands of dollars have been spent on coloring, cuts, and styling.  And guess what?  Their hair still looks like crap.

Lindsay Lohan has a moderate excuse, for some reason she had to go Morticia black for the movie Chapter 27.  Jared Leto also had to transform himself for the same movie, and gain 50 pounds - because everyone knows there aren't already fat actors out there that they could have cast.  Color aside, does her hair have to look so flimsy?  The lush, curly extensions contrast sharply with the frail, fine, old lady hair she has on top.  And her eye makeup looks tatooed on, like a 50-year old biker chick.  Combine the bad hair, bad makeup, and the dress that makes it look like her torso is taking up 3/4ths of her body - and she just looks dead inside.

And Fergie, once someone can explain to me what the hell happened to your face, maybe then I'll spend some time wondering what happened to your hair.  If you want bold contrasting colors, then get a panel weave - don't do chunky stripes - it isn't 2002, and you're not Kelly Clarkson.