Bad Hair Day

Britney Spears: You Did This To Her!

IMDB.com reports that Britney's terrible black dyejob is actually a desperate attempt to help her image. Apparently, little Miss Britney thought it would be a clever, and chaotically "real" (airquotes!) for her to do her own hair and makeup for the Dateline interview debacle seen by millions of people. After hearing the milllion different articulations of "rats nest" to describe her hair, she decided to take out her extensions and bought a bottle of black dye. Yes, she DYED IT HERSELF! Touching up roots, or covering up gray can be easily accomplished with home hair dye, but making such a drastic color change requires a professional colorist.

"Spears' representative insists the singer checked with her doctor first to see if dying her hair was safe for her unborn child adding, "It's vegetable dye and will wash right out."  Oh man, Britney, vegetable dye my ass! Just because you're shaped like an eggplant, doesn't mean I'll believe you use vegetable dye. When she continued to color and bleach her hair during the Preston pregnancy, and during the beginning of this one, she was not using vegetable dye. She was using ammonia and bleach. Sure there is no conclusive evidence between hair dye and birth defects, but Britney knows that people love to jump all over her for being a bad mother. She'll lie, dye, and cry all she can for people to love her again. And with her new bad hair (which won't just "wash out", she will have to strip the color out) is not going to help.

How about not going on television and various magazine covers and asking people to leave you alone, Britney? How about just going away and letting the fickle nature of pop culture wash you away from our lives forever?

Technorati Tags: Britney Spears, Hair Dye, Circling the Drain

Nicole Kidman: Completely Gray

For those who doubted whether or not Nicole Kidman has gone gray, just check out her roots (shoddy MS Paint arrow courtesy of me).

But all is not lost when it comes to her hair.  Many people miss the old redhead Nicole, and even if she doesn't want to attempt putting a darker color on her gray, she can always get some great wigs.  Besides, what would a fledgling gay icon be without a fantastic assortment of wigs?  Perhaps, Cher can recommend a good wigmaster.

Technorati Tags: Nicole Kidman, Gray Hair, Scientologist Beard

Gwen Stefani: Mom Hair

Mom Hair. Haphazard, frazzled, thrown up in a hurry on your way out the door.  It happens to the best of us, or in Gwen's case the most overhyped, least-talented, most obnoxious and fashion deluded of us.  At least this hair is better than the impossibly long, and impossibly stupid faux platinum ponytail she sported in the baby pictures she sold off. 

Will Gwen switch to a more sensible, more attractive, and less bleachrot style in order to make more time for her baby?  I really don't think so, since there is already talk of a new No Doubt album and children's clothing line.

And this really doesn't count as my "real celebrity" post that I need to do.  If anyone has any great pictures of Salma Hayek or Cher they want to send my way, by all means do.

Technorati Tags: Gwen Stefani, Celebrity Babies, Mom Hair, Talentless Bitches

Paris Hilton: Back to Back Bitch

I hate to do sequential Paris Hilton posts, because talking about her only contributes to the Paris disease.  If only Valtrex could cure hearing about Paris Hilton all the damn time.

The color is creepy and wrong, and the style makes it look like she dug through Tara Reid's trash can for used hair extensions.

There, I said it.  I think I'm gonna have to do an actual celebrity post to cleanse my mind of this bitch.

Image Source: Faded Youth

Technorati Tags: Paris Hilton, Hair Extensions, Bad Hair, Herpes

Paris Hilton: Take Your Wig and Go Home

No, Paris Hilton did not pull a Britney and dye her hair black too.  She just decided to change it up and wear a wig to one of the billion pointless events she shows up to so she can convince herself that she is important.

I don't hate the wig style and giant sunglasses because it covers up a good portion of her face.  The color is pretty darn flat, though, and is not a flattering color for her.  What hair color do I think would look best on Paris?  How about the hair color I don't have to see plastered all over because this bitch is addicted to showing up at places and getting her picture taken.

Technorati Tags: Paris Hilton, Wig, Herpes

Kate Bosworth: Bad Casting and Bad Hair

So ... this is the gal they cast as Lois Lane?  The smart, determined, tough-as-nails journalist whose only weakness is a soft spot for men in tights ... and they cast a boring bobble-head who can't act?

This bitch has ruined Lois Lane for me and I hope her scalp is still burning from her botched bleach job.

Technorati Tags: Kate Bosworth, Superman, Lois Lane, Bad Hair

Victoria Beckham Bald Spot

Astute BHD Reader Jackie Danicki was clever enough to send this picture link about poor 'ol Posh Spice going bald.  It would be easy to look at this tranny-esque woman and just assume that her lack of eating habits is causing this, but it's actually due to her addiction to being as synthetic as she can possibly be.  And sadly, if you are a hair extension junkie, the same thing can happen to you.

Hair extensions are a drug - sure they look great when you first get them but you have to keep sinking more time and more money into them to make sure they keep looking great.  If you slack off, you start looking like fake hair hillbilly, Britney Spears.  If you continue to rely on hair extensions for a long period of time, the stress caused from the glue or tracks on your scalp will cause your hair to fall out.  If you don't get extensions professionally removed, when they fall out they will take some of your natural hair with them.

If you want to save yourself thousands of dollars and bald spots, you should probably just grow your own damn hair.  There are also plenty of great clip in extensions that you can use, which will add volume and length, but you can easily remove them at the end of the day and not lose any hair over it.  I recommend Put on Pieces human hair extensions.

Technorati Tags: Victoria Beckham, Posh Spice, Hair Extensions, Balding

Britney Spears Dyed Her Hair Black!?

BREAKING HAIR NEWS: Move over Angelina, there is a new raven-haired baby-toting momma in Hollywood (so you better stay in Namibia, bitch and keep your hands off K-Fed).

This is a very drastic change for Britney - and I would have preferred that she just gradually go darker with more lowlights over time, versus dyeing over her bleach rot hair.  Bleached hair is very porous and it soaks up color quite well, but it doesn't hold it.  We'll see how long this color lasts on her, because we all know she has no idea how to take care of her hair (cause she's country, y'all).  At least the extensions are out, and the hair is too short to pull up into a Britney Bun.

Technorati Tags: Britney Spears, Black Hair, Bad Hair, Hair Dye, Hair Color

Nicole Kidman: I just feel bad for you. . .

So. . . is Nicole Kidman visiting Sharon Stone's stylist?  Despite only turning 39, Nicole is sporting some seriously geriatic hair.  Many people miss Nicole's ridiculously untamable red locks - but that sad truth is her hair has gone completely grey.

Completely grey hair is a bitch.  Since the hair lacks pigment, it doesn't hold color as well - which is why many ladies like Nicole just go blonde (Barbara Walters and Diane Sawyer do too).  The texture of grey hair is very coarse and wiry, which explains the drastic frizz farm Nicole has cultivated on her scalp.

But what is Nicole to do?  Grey, curly, coarse hair is enough to make anyone just shave their head and give up.  But at least she's still trying.  I wish she would go a darker color (which she usually does when she wigs it up for a role).  Even though Nicole has hard knock hair that I sympathize with, as the Bad Hair Czar I must add a Nicole Kidman category.

Technorati Tags: Nicole Kidman, Grey Hair, Gray Hair, Curly Hair

Keira Knightley: InStyle Eyebrows?

I've had my issues with InStyle Magazine covers in the past (see here and here) but this cover really scares the hell out of me.  Those eyebrows are just terrifying.  They overwhelm Ms. Knightley's delicate face, and I refuse to believe they were there during the original shoot.  No, those eyebrows had to be photoshopped in.  I don't even think they used the photoshop program, they put those in with a Sharpie marker.

Please do not emulate these disaster brows.  While I don't agree with people lightening their hair at home (leave highlights to the professionals), you can easily lighten your eyebrows at home using a facial hair bleach.  Make sure to leave the bleach on for the shortest possible time (you can always reapply), and aim for a couple shades darker than the hair on your head.

Technorati Tags: Keira Knightley, InStyle Magazine, Eyebrows